FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE.

Wedding vows:
promises a couple makes to each other during a wedding ceremony.
Okay, and I think in the movies
i've heard "for better, for worse"
plenty of times.
So what does it really mean?

To me, that's probably the most meaningful part of
the speech.
What I've been through with my other
just in the past year and a half..
"For Worse"...
I guess the struggle has changed me...
But I guess not enough..

Because he got mad when i asked,
if it might be better to break up
for awhile,
Til both of us got our shit together...
When ever we talk about
what we need to fix in our
lives..
He talks like i'm the only one with changing to do..
Well...
I think we both have growing up
to do.
I had a baby at 18,
and another at 20.
I wasn't even done growing up yet.
And he definitely wasn't ready when I blew into his life with my peanut,
[after 4 years of having no contact with each other]
and then kinda forced another baby,
when he didn't want any children.
[LMAO!]
But he knew what he was getting into.
[shrug]
it is what it is.
They're here now,
and we need to get our shit together for these kids!
And lately, i've been thinking that
it might be easier if we took a little time apart.
I still love him with all my ♥,
but maybe it would be good for us.
But the part of me that's still a little girl,
is almost too scared to do it
for fear that he'll "cheat" on me
while we're "not together".
So it's a conflict...
[sigh]
there's always a conflict lately.

Sleepy...
Been blazin all day...
[LOL]
=]-~